The STUPID FILTER

                   The STUPID FILTER

You know I reckon there should be a filter between the mouth and the brain,

I tend to say what I think then sometimes I repeat it and say it once again.

What’s that you said someone will very stupidly say to me,

So then I will repeat myself enunciating to the nth degree.

`You Sir are very wrong and most likely stupid to boot,` I’ll say,

`Did you not hear me say Black is White so why did you call it Grey?`

`I do believe I’ve told you this at least a hundred times before,`

`No I will stand corrected it has been a few times more.`

Now if there was a filter no disagreement ever would occur,

It would be quite a conversation till both parties did concur.

But the stupid would still be stupid, without ever being told,

And stupidity would multiply and become uncontrolled.

Now I find the very stupid don’t like to be informed of their affliction,

They start to work their jaws as if to argue and give you contradiction.

But alas the stupid keep on breeding and believe that Black is White,

And they get most upset when you point out that that’s not right.

Good or bad I have this habit of saying exactly what I think,

And if you smell a bit I’m inclined to tell you that you stink.

If I think you’re stupid; which you probably are, I’ll surely tell you so,

Don’t say you didn’t realize cos after talking to me you’re bound to know.

You can tell the stupid most anything and they’ll generally believe,

And you don’t have to be clever, if the stupid, you want to deceive.

Tell them Red is Crimson they’ll look at you with disbelieving eyes,

But just promise them it’s the truth, and that you are not telling lies.

                                                © Corin Linch 30/5/2014

The Black Dog Returns

          The Black Dog Returns

There is a black dog hanging round and scratching at my gate,

For some unknown reason he seems to think he’s still my mate.

I tried to hunt the mongrel cos I don’t need a visit at this time,

But he keeps on scratching and insists he’s a mate of mine.

We were pretty much companions then he’d suddenly disappear,

Then when I was feeling down the bastard would suddenly reappear.

He would just come out of nowhere like a ghost on the breeze,

Wagging his tail wildly, the cur was so eager, me to please.

He is whimpering and scratching cos I won’t open up and let him in,

Saliva drips from his mouth and he looks at me with a very devilish grin,

I reckon he thinks I’m weak, all because I’ve nurtured him before,

But I’ll tell you something; that whimpering is so hard to ignore.

I head towards the gate, and watch as his excitement seems to grow,

But I’ve a trick up my sleeve and it’s one he doesn’t know.

With chain and a padlock called Love the gate I firmly lock,

The slavering beast is now yelping as he looks at me with shock.

With his tail between his legs as he slowly slinks away,

The black clouds covering the sky are now turning grey.

As the sun breaks through I realize the Black Dog has disappeared,

It’s amazing how you see the world; once the sky has cleared.

                                                © Corin Linch 24/5/14